Alter-ego: Umbridge

Hopefully you haven't noticed this before, but I bear a striking resemblance to Dolores Umbridge (of Harry Potter fame). I know what you're thinking--I'm much prettier, much nicer, and much more magical than Professor Umbridge. At least that's what I would like you to be thinking. But the truth is, I can be a bit of a Jekyll and Hyde, especially when it comes to running my household. Sweet and patient one moment, hard-nosed and unyielding the next.

My children recently started saying, "You're like Umbridge!" whenever I introduce a new rule. So I have begun referring to my rules as "Household Decrees." I'm sure we have many of the same rules you have at your house, but we probably also have a few that are unique and created specifically for my personal idiosyncracies. (One that comes to mind is "No whistling in the car." If this rule is not one of yours, I highly recommend it. It has brought great peace and harmony to my realm.)

Here is our latest. We're calling it "Household Decree Number 27":

"Anyone found leaving a bathroom door open shall be fined 25 cents for the first violation, 50 cents thereafter, and an additional fee shall apply if the baby does any damage before the mistake is discovered and rectified."

Now I just need a faithful caretaker to come and nail my decrees to our castle wall. (Actually, I think that would be a violation of one of my husband's decrees about putting unnecessary holes in the wall.)